two weeks later and beetles still aren't out yet. don't blame them though, it's cold! and wet. weather needs to make up its mind. yesterday it said...hmmm maybe i'll be sunny today, oh! no, guess not, it's more fun to tease the silly little earthlings.
went to chicago for a couple days to get visas and visit the boy. chinese beauracracy is a pain in the ass! but i guess i've known that. i think the only reason chinese people become authorities is so they can have power over other people to push them around and make them feel stupid. i really don't see any other reason. they obviously don't enjoy their jobs, and god forbid actually wanting to serve the general public! why make life easier on people when your own life was so miserable? spread the pain!
after my two hour ordeal at the chinese consulate, wandered around chicago again. still stick to my claim that it's not a real city. went to the art institute, got in for free cuz the security gaurd was hitting on me, thoroughly enjoyed the art collection. went home with the boy, met all sorts of godmothers and sisters and brothers....boy's car overheated and died, not suprisingly. that thing has had everything that could go wrong, go wrong. radiator broke, starter messed up, trans died, headers melted, brakes deteriorated, body dented up, headlights/tailight wiring messed up, pistons fucked, i swear, at some point, every single working part of that car has been disfunctional or just plain dead. and he still insists on fixing it, won't give the poor thing up.
there was such a sense of community. we went to the boy's sister's dance recital at the elementary school everybody knew everybody and their mamas. i was the only non-black person there, kinda intimidating since i didn't know anybody either, and they all stared me down. made me wonder what it would've been like to live in the same place all my life and get to know everybody around me. i would know my neighbors! the people down the street, the people at my school and their parents, the grocery store clerks, the bus drivers, the mailman...what a happy little community it would've been if we had stayed in rockville, md. maybe. the boy says that even though i saw everybody laughing and talking, half of them hate eachother behind their backs. community politics :) it's stuff like, her son wouldn't go out with my daughter, so i ignored her at the grocery store. or her daughter's prettier and more talented than mine so i'm gonna talk shit about her. i spose the pettiness could be annoying, but hey.
saw shrek 2 we were the only two people in the theater...:)
went horseback riding. i want a horse farm. but never ever that close to any city. it was really pathetic, we rode around a cornfield, basically. a long shot from riding out in the mountains of costa rica. someday...i'll have my own horses out in the middle of some pretty nowhere. actually, i want my own zoo too, but we'll see :)
and another thing - fried food...all i have to say is, that's where the term ghetto booty comes from.
it just hit me that our families are so different. they don't seem like a family to me, just a bunch of people living together in a house. no family meals, just eat whatever and whenever they feel like. no routines, schedules, anything really. it's a very relaxed-almost-to-the-point-of-lazy, spontaneous life. and i spose that's the difference btwn our lifestyles, and it shows (how to put this...) economically, academically, socially....we're close to the opposite ends of the spectrum. this is something i've struggled with all my life - the allocation of my time and money. my mother is one extreme- every moment is dedicated towards some purpose, every dollar spent frugally. fine. that's understandable. but what about the other end? the boy's philosophy is; if i've got money, why not spend it? what's the point of having it if i can't enjoy it? it's a very live life in the moment way of thinking. for most of my life, i've been trying to find a balance. where, oh where, the happy medium? sometimes i think i should live like my mother and just learn to find joy in study and work, it's not a bad idea. but, quite frankly, i'm a lazy person, and it just doesn't work. ah, aksldjfaewiour! whatever, it's just whatever.
guess i'm not done rambling. i was reading a book in which the author compared fucking to junk food, and making love to real food. it's a comparison between superficial quick fixes to satiate a desire and a more profound, genuine solution; something that tastes or feels good but isn't necessarily good vs. something that doesn't necessarily feel/taste good but is good. i liked that analogy much. it really applies to everythign. junk food movies/books (teenybopper dealios, chick-flicks) and real movies/books, junk food cars (fords!) and real cars (heh heh), any everyday object really. and i spose you could even apply it to life in general;, you could live a junk food life and get off on every high that comes your way, or live a more profound life. blah. i'm really done now.
went to chicago for a couple days to get visas and visit the boy. chinese beauracracy is a pain in the ass! but i guess i've known that. i think the only reason chinese people become authorities is so they can have power over other people to push them around and make them feel stupid. i really don't see any other reason. they obviously don't enjoy their jobs, and god forbid actually wanting to serve the general public! why make life easier on people when your own life was so miserable? spread the pain!
after my two hour ordeal at the chinese consulate, wandered around chicago again. still stick to my claim that it's not a real city. went to the art institute, got in for free cuz the security gaurd was hitting on me, thoroughly enjoyed the art collection. went home with the boy, met all sorts of godmothers and sisters and brothers....boy's car overheated and died, not suprisingly. that thing has had everything that could go wrong, go wrong. radiator broke, starter messed up, trans died, headers melted, brakes deteriorated, body dented up, headlights/tailight wiring messed up, pistons fucked, i swear, at some point, every single working part of that car has been disfunctional or just plain dead. and he still insists on fixing it, won't give the poor thing up.
there was such a sense of community. we went to the boy's sister's dance recital at the elementary school everybody knew everybody and their mamas. i was the only non-black person there, kinda intimidating since i didn't know anybody either, and they all stared me down. made me wonder what it would've been like to live in the same place all my life and get to know everybody around me. i would know my neighbors! the people down the street, the people at my school and their parents, the grocery store clerks, the bus drivers, the mailman...what a happy little community it would've been if we had stayed in rockville, md. maybe. the boy says that even though i saw everybody laughing and talking, half of them hate eachother behind their backs. community politics :) it's stuff like, her son wouldn't go out with my daughter, so i ignored her at the grocery store. or her daughter's prettier and more talented than mine so i'm gonna talk shit about her. i spose the pettiness could be annoying, but hey.
saw shrek 2 we were the only two people in the theater...:)
went horseback riding. i want a horse farm. but never ever that close to any city. it was really pathetic, we rode around a cornfield, basically. a long shot from riding out in the mountains of costa rica. someday...i'll have my own horses out in the middle of some pretty nowhere. actually, i want my own zoo too, but we'll see :)
and another thing - fried food...all i have to say is, that's where the term ghetto booty comes from.
it just hit me that our families are so different. they don't seem like a family to me, just a bunch of people living together in a house. no family meals, just eat whatever and whenever they feel like. no routines, schedules, anything really. it's a very relaxed-almost-to-the-point-of-lazy, spontaneous life. and i spose that's the difference btwn our lifestyles, and it shows (how to put this...) economically, academically, socially....we're close to the opposite ends of the spectrum. this is something i've struggled with all my life - the allocation of my time and money. my mother is one extreme- every moment is dedicated towards some purpose, every dollar spent frugally. fine. that's understandable. but what about the other end? the boy's philosophy is; if i've got money, why not spend it? what's the point of having it if i can't enjoy it? it's a very live life in the moment way of thinking. for most of my life, i've been trying to find a balance. where, oh where, the happy medium? sometimes i think i should live like my mother and just learn to find joy in study and work, it's not a bad idea. but, quite frankly, i'm a lazy person, and it just doesn't work. ah, aksldjfaewiour! whatever, it's just whatever.
guess i'm not done rambling. i was reading a book in which the author compared fucking to junk food, and making love to real food. it's a comparison between superficial quick fixes to satiate a desire and a more profound, genuine solution; something that tastes or feels good but isn't necessarily good vs. something that doesn't necessarily feel/taste good but is good. i liked that analogy much. it really applies to everythign. junk food movies/books (teenybopper dealios, chick-flicks) and real movies/books, junk food cars (fords!) and real cars (heh heh), any everyday object really. and i spose you could even apply it to life in general;, you could live a junk food life and get off on every high that comes your way, or live a more profound life. blah. i'm really done now.
posted by wynee at 7:08 PM
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